[Track 1]
...his momma
MUM: Hello, Rei!
REI: Mom?
MUM: How are ya? Guess where we are!
REI: Uh... Italy?
MUM: You're right, Rei! We're in Venise
REI: Must be... VEry nICE
MUM: Nice one, Rei
DAD: And how are you, Rei? You got a girl?
REI: I uh... I guess so
DAD: Ask if she cute!
MUM: Dad wants to know if she cute
REI: She's... Yes! she's really cute! Stop asking! This topic's over for life!
Later, Rei and Kathryn go to Hall's place. Rei, Ken & Hall are sitting around the table
HALL: Listen to this part
REI: Nah, dude... I know. Jimmy Pop is a new genious
HALL: He's a total genius
REI: Geniusly smart
KATH: Who's a genius?
REI: Jimmy Pop. It's his album from last year
KATH: Who's that?
KEN: The Bloodhound Gang guy
KATH: Oh... Him...
HALL: So, we're making Joan's old schnitzel family recipe
REI: Joan's German?!
HALL: Yeah, but... what was that's your first thought when you heard that? Also, didn't you know already? she's spoken in German many times
...
Yina appears at the door.
YINA: Yo.
REI: Hey, Yina! This is Kathryn!
KATH: Hello.
YINA: Hey.
So now, Ken and Hall are cooking like they always do (they cook something that ain't food), While Yina, Rei and Kath sit at the table
YINA: So... How'd you 2 meet?
KATH: It's a long story
REI: Ask the Later Alligator
YINA: Um, i don't tell nobody this but... i used to date Rei in high school
KATH: Really?
YINA: Yeah, but... it's wasn't like crazy or some shit
REI: That's in the past. Don't worry about it, Kathy Pie
YINA: Kathy Pie, [BRO], you serious right now?
KATH: Seriously, Rei?
REI: No! That wasn't real! That, uh... that was an illusion from the wicked witch of the 4th dimension!
HALL: Hey, so... the food... it is done
They eat
REI: Hm... tastes just like chicken...
YINA: Because it is, dumbass
[Track 2]
But what they didn't know was that Paula was watching from the window and now she's on the run... wow... look at her go... to the store, of course. where she gonna call...
PAULA: Yoshimi! Can we meet up at my house in like 20 minutes? ... Yoshimi, this is SERIOUS! I need someone to talk to right now! ...I know it's been like 2 week but I've found out something! Something crazy!
...She looks at the thing she's about to buy, which is a hair dye
PAULA: So, 20 minutes, right?
20 minutes later
PAULA: He left me for a fatty cake, patty cake!
YOSH: Really?
PAULA: I know, right?! I thought i was perfect
YOSH: Maybe he's just an idiot
PAULA: He's not! He's a nice guy, i mean... he said, i was too young to go out with him and how he didn't want to hurt me, right? Can you read the instructions for me? I'm too angry to READ!
YOSH: Are you really gonna dye your hair?
Later, after she's put the friggin dye in her hair
YOSH: So, uh... Stay still for a half hour
PAULA: 30 Minutes?! Dang, that stings! ...I think he's only with her because she older... She's probably like 30!
YOSH: ...And fat
PAULA: And fat and ugly and stupid...
...
PAULA: Is it water time now?
YOSH: Yeah
Later, after Paula dyed... her hair (which was a waste because all she dyed was a single strand of hair and she dyed it an orange darker than her own) She's now dressing herself up
YOSH: Paula, you look... fucking ridiculous
PAULA: Shut up! I look awesome!
YOSH: What even is that song?
PAULA: It's called Mount Gore, chud. It's black metal. You'd never never understand
YOSH: Sure... what are you even doing all this for
PAULA: Because I... am gonna go... POSTAL... Dad's gonna be so proud
Meanwhile, at Kathryn's house, her cat gets on Rei's lap
REI: Since when did you have a cat?
KATH: I found him outside
REI: What's the lil guy's name?
KATH: Ranking Full Stop
REI: You named him after The English Beat song?
KATH: Nope.
REI: Mark said we could not keep a kitten in our house
KATH: Dude, i don't want to offend you but... you live in Hobbit house
...
REI: If you were a guy, I'd hit you.
KATH: Too pussy to hit me?
REI: Can we talk about something else? Like... uh... Glenn Blurred? I gotta fight him tomorrow
KATH: Uh... we met in some class at 14 and we dated for like a month before i dumped him
REI: Nothing ever happened? Not even a liter of blood?
KATH: We did kiss under a rain of blood when it took out our ciggies
REI: You smoked??
KATH: Ugh, yeah... But i stop in Uni
REI: You smoked for years??
Kathryn punches Rei on the gut.... and it was HARD
REI: Ugh... W-what was that for...?
KATH: To keep you on your toes
[Track 3]
Later...
REI: Thanks for coming to my fight, man. I hate fighting all alone.
Rei and Mark are headed up to the Linkin Park, built besides the Casa Dí Claypool, a castle built exclusively for King Claypool III, the former ruler of Nutolia before his death in 1972 in the Nutvolution (that, let's be honest, hurt the country more than it help...) Anyways... As they walk up, they find Glenn, sat reading "The Story Of The Socially Awkward Penguin" by Jamie Prong when he notices them
GLENN: May i help you guys?
REI: Ahem... He's Bam's buddy and he talked to me!
MARK: He's evil, remember?
GLENN: What is this? Who are you?
REI: Um... I'm Rei Reil
GLENN: Good to know...
Glenn gets up and walks over to Rei
REI: Anyways, can you give me Bam's num-
Then, Glenn grabs Rei's legs and throws him against the castle's side with a loud SHLONK!
(Also, Yina and Ken are here too now lol)
GLENN: I have a bunch of chips and beer in my mini fridge
REI: Sounds good to me
So, break time!
REI: What movie are you filming here?
GLENN: It's called "Devil In A New Dress." I co-star alongside Chasey Thirlwell. It's my first romance film
REI: Ain't that girl 16?
GLENN: Dude, I'm not the guy casting this
REI: Is it gonna suck?
GLENN: Let's change topics
Rei sips his beer
REI: Uh... you got any embarrassing stories with Kathy?
GLENN: Only embarrassing to me. It was heartbreaking
REI: Wait, what? She left you?
GLENN: She left me for the first Son of a gun she saw. I still how Dr. Evil she was
REI: She didn't tell about this part
GLENN: There's a load of things she won't tell you. She's the pretender and a cheater
REI: what
GLENN: She cheated on me and dated the asshole! Sniff How could she be so heartless?!
YINA: Reminds ya of someone?
MARK: It's like they were made for each other
REI: Dude, you're good at acting
GLENN: The Oscar is mine this year. Give me $200 and I'll let you go
REI: What a sell out...
GLENN: Break's over, you dirty rotten imbecile.
REI: Uh, um. W-wait! Before you kill me, i want you to meet my friend!
GLENN: What do i care?
Glenn punches Rei, making him spill his beer on Yina's shirt
YINA: [DUDE], you ruined my shirt!
REI: She mad, y'all...
Rei coughs blood
GLENN: What you gon do about it? Cry?
She punches him hard and it hurts! A lot
YINA: You sorry now, pussy ass [BITCH]?
GLENN: I-i am...
YINA: Good
But before she can stomp his skull away, Rei gets up and uh... i dunno what he had in mind TBH...
REI: Wait, this is my story! I'm the one who has to defeat the bad guy!
GLENN: Don't kick someone while they're down....
REI: No, man. I have a good plan, uh... I left $200 dollar at the bottom of that long ass stairwell! Also, can you give me Bam's number?
GLENN: ...I'll get my Bike
Glenn gets in his bike and rides down but because of that gut destroying punch, he ends up falling over breaking away all his bones and dying
REI: This sucks!
MARK: But you won...
REI: I didn't even get Bam's number!
MARK: Dumbass...
REI: Look! His phone!
Rei grabs the phone but it's broken
REI: Well, at least i can steal his money!
Rei goes for Glenn's wallet but all that's inside, is a photo of Chasey with her number on the back
REI: There's still his bike, right??
Rei gets on Glenn's bike and it immediately breaks in 3030 pieces
REI: ...I hate my life...
MARK: Sucks to be you, huh?
Meanwhile, at Nutolia's public library... erm... I don't wanna alarm y'all but... uh... there's a fricking CRAZY person the ceiling! GULP!
